I entered eighth grade with much trepidation about pre-algebra. Rumors abounded about how hard the class would be; after all, it involved math with letters. What in the world? I had always loved math, but I thought that this class might just change my feelings about the subject.
Almost intuitively, I started praying each night that the Lord would open my mind to understand the next day's lesson. I prayed this every night throughout the year, and the Lord faithfully provided the wisdom and understanding that I needed for each new lesson. I finished the year with my love for math still intact.
Yet, when I got to trigonometry as a junior in high school, I didn't receive the warnings. And it didn't occur to me to pray when day after day my brain couldn't grasp how to do computations with sine, cosine, and tangent. Thankfully, that class didn't count towards my GPA because trig and I remain enemies to this day.
The other day, as I was telling a friend about my pre-algebra prayers, she remarked, "That was wise beyond your years."
I hadn't thought about those prayers until that conversation. And I began to think about all the things I've gone through since my math days when it would have been helpful to pray in advance for wisdom. I often prayed that the Lord would help me to do well, but I seemed to lack the insight (or wisdom) to pray for wisdom. On many occasions, I was guilty of thinking that I had what it took mentally to get the task done; I just thought I just needed the Lord's help to help me regurgitate what I had studied. Oh how prideful those thoughts and actions were!
My challenge now is to get back into that eighth-grade pre-algebra prayer mode. I want to be intentional about seeking wisdom from the Lord for every aspect of my life. And the good thing is that His Word promises that if we ask for wisdom and believe He will give it, He will. I have nothing to lose, except my pride, and I'm ready to let that go.
"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts I like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind." James 1:5-6
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Sunday, May 12, 2013
April/May Update
It's been more than a month of Sundays since I last posted, so an update is way overdue. Some of the posting absence was planned, but the latter part was due to the blue screen of death that appeared on my computer, which required purchasing a replacement. Navigating Windows 8 has proven that you can teach an old dog new tricks; it just takes about three times longer. I felt such a sense of accomplishment when I finally figured out today how to install the printer driver. I still don't know how to use all the functions on here, but the big E button to the internet is working, and so there's no reason to delay blogging any longer.
What I've Been Enjoying
During my time away from the blog, I enjoyed four days with family at a beautiful house on the Guadalupe River.
(View from the dining room looking onto the pool and the river)
I had fun catching up last weekend with my Sunday Supper Club from grad school. We toured the Chagall exhibit at the Dallas Museum of Art and told stories over lunch at Oddfellows in the Bishop Arts District. Catching up over good food reminded me of all the meals we shared together and how many recipes they taught me to cook. I wish we lived closer and could gather every week.
With the expanded extra daylight hours, the opportunity to engage in fun activities after work has also expanded. I've loved going to a smoothie party, a baseball game, and a ballet and spending time with friends.
I've also enjoyed learning from my friends as they demonstrate intentionality in leading the lost to Christ, in pursuing their callings, in discipling others, and in giving up the things of this world in order to find sufficiency in Christ alone. I never doubt that our lives can preach because I see such incredible examples daily.
What I've Been Pondering
Over the past month or so, I've heard several Scriptures mentioned numerous times. I never think that's a coincidence. The Lord obviously has something for me in these verses, and so I don't want to forget them.
Matthew 6:33
"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
Psalm 139:23-24
"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."
Joel 2:25 (NKJV)
"So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the crawling locus, the consuming locust, and the chewing locust."
Luke 18:1-8 (the parable of the persistent widow)
"And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.' For some time he (the judge) refused. But finally he said to himself,' . . . [B]ecause this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice . . . .' And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly."
What I've Been Reading
Daring Greatly by Brene Brown.
I underlined a ton in this book. Her research on shame is eye-opening and has drawn international attention since the talk she gave at TedxHouston a couple of years ago. This book focuses on how vulnerability is not a weakness but rather a major strength. She covers how this is needed in the corporate world, education, and in parenting. Here are a few excerpts:
"If we want to reignite innovation and passion, we have to rehumanize work. When shame becomes a management style, engagement dies. When failure is not an option we can forget about learning, creativity, and innovation." (p. 15)
"When it comes to parenting, the practice of framing mothers and fathers as good or bad is both rampant and corrosive--it turns parenting into a shame minefield. The real questions for parents should be: "Are you engaged? Are you paying attention?" If so, plan to make lots of mistakes and bad decisions. Imperfect parenting moments turn into gifts as our children watch us try to figure out what went wrong and how we can do better next time. The mandate is not to be perfect and raise happy children. Perfection doesn't exist, and I've found that what makes children happy doesn't always prepare them to be courageous, engaged adults." (p. 15)
Towards the end of the book, Brown shares "The Daring Greatly Leadership Manifesto" (p. 212) and "The Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto" (p. 244), both of which are fantastic.
Our Southern Breeze by Daphene Jones.
I loved reading Same Kind of Different As Me, the story of Deborah Hall's befriending a homeless man (Denver Moore). Her acts of courage are even more astounding in light of this book, which was authored by her twin sister and tells the story of her upbringing. It's a beautiful story of how grace wins out over darkness and how suffering and can change hearts.
Bread and Wine by Shauna Niequist.
I loved Shauna's previous books, Cold Tangerines and Bittersweet, and so it was like catching up with an old friend as I read through her latest essays in Bread and Wine. She has a way with words and can eloquently, and often hilariously, draft situations that I've experienced or emotions that I've felt. This book is one that you won't want to end as she shares stories from her supper club and how important it is to gather people around your table for a meal. This book made me miss my old Sunday Supper Club, so I was glad I was able to see them last week. I have already sent copies of this book to my mom and my aunt, and they've already made several of the recipes that are included in the book; it's one of those books you can't help but share.
If you've read this far, thanks for hanging in there for the long update. I'd love to hear what you are enjoying these days.
What I've Been Enjoying
During my time away from the blog, I enjoyed four days with family at a beautiful house on the Guadalupe River.
(View from the dining room looking onto the pool and the river)
I had fun catching up last weekend with my Sunday Supper Club from grad school. We toured the Chagall exhibit at the Dallas Museum of Art and told stories over lunch at Oddfellows in the Bishop Arts District. Catching up over good food reminded me of all the meals we shared together and how many recipes they taught me to cook. I wish we lived closer and could gather every week.
With the expanded extra daylight hours, the opportunity to engage in fun activities after work has also expanded. I've loved going to a smoothie party, a baseball game, and a ballet and spending time with friends.
I've also enjoyed learning from my friends as they demonstrate intentionality in leading the lost to Christ, in pursuing their callings, in discipling others, and in giving up the things of this world in order to find sufficiency in Christ alone. I never doubt that our lives can preach because I see such incredible examples daily.
What I've Been Pondering
Over the past month or so, I've heard several Scriptures mentioned numerous times. I never think that's a coincidence. The Lord obviously has something for me in these verses, and so I don't want to forget them.
Matthew 6:33
"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
Psalm 139:23-24
"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."
Joel 2:25 (NKJV)
"So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the crawling locus, the consuming locust, and the chewing locust."
Luke 18:1-8 (the parable of the persistent widow)
"And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.' For some time he (the judge) refused. But finally he said to himself,' . . . [B]ecause this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice . . . .' And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly."
What I've Been Reading
Daring Greatly by Brene Brown.
I underlined a ton in this book. Her research on shame is eye-opening and has drawn international attention since the talk she gave at TedxHouston a couple of years ago. This book focuses on how vulnerability is not a weakness but rather a major strength. She covers how this is needed in the corporate world, education, and in parenting. Here are a few excerpts:
"If we want to reignite innovation and passion, we have to rehumanize work. When shame becomes a management style, engagement dies. When failure is not an option we can forget about learning, creativity, and innovation." (p. 15)
"When it comes to parenting, the practice of framing mothers and fathers as good or bad is both rampant and corrosive--it turns parenting into a shame minefield. The real questions for parents should be: "Are you engaged? Are you paying attention?" If so, plan to make lots of mistakes and bad decisions. Imperfect parenting moments turn into gifts as our children watch us try to figure out what went wrong and how we can do better next time. The mandate is not to be perfect and raise happy children. Perfection doesn't exist, and I've found that what makes children happy doesn't always prepare them to be courageous, engaged adults." (p. 15)
Towards the end of the book, Brown shares "The Daring Greatly Leadership Manifesto" (p. 212) and "The Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto" (p. 244), both of which are fantastic.
Our Southern Breeze by Daphene Jones.
I loved reading Same Kind of Different As Me, the story of Deborah Hall's befriending a homeless man (Denver Moore). Her acts of courage are even more astounding in light of this book, which was authored by her twin sister and tells the story of her upbringing. It's a beautiful story of how grace wins out over darkness and how suffering and can change hearts.
Bread and Wine by Shauna Niequist.
I loved Shauna's previous books, Cold Tangerines and Bittersweet, and so it was like catching up with an old friend as I read through her latest essays in Bread and Wine. She has a way with words and can eloquently, and often hilariously, draft situations that I've experienced or emotions that I've felt. This book is one that you won't want to end as she shares stories from her supper club and how important it is to gather people around your table for a meal. This book made me miss my old Sunday Supper Club, so I was glad I was able to see them last week. I have already sent copies of this book to my mom and my aunt, and they've already made several of the recipes that are included in the book; it's one of those books you can't help but share.
If you've read this far, thanks for hanging in there for the long update. I'd love to hear what you are enjoying these days.
Sunday, April 7, 2013
His Grace As Shown Through the Body of Christ
I'm not one who likes to feel helpless. I've got my to-do lists and plans and prefer to muddle through them on my own rather than asking for help.
But after a difficult March, which found me awakening most nights struggling to breathe because my nasal passages had swollen shut, I made the decision to undergo septoplasty to correct my double-deviated septum. It wasn't easy to wave the white flag, knowing that I would be dependent on others for several days.
And yet, it was during this time of dependence that I was able to see even more clearly the Lord's provision. This time through the Body of Christ that He has surrounded me with:
--A sweet friend got up at dark-thirty and drove me and my mother to the hospital.
--Another sweet friend picked us up from the hospital and brought us dinner.
--Friends and family prayed me through.
--Friends and family texted and called to check on me.
--A cookie bouquet arrived from a friend.
--A friend loaned me Downton Abbey to occupy my mind and to help pass the time.
--Another friend brought dinner.
--Co-workers covered for me at work.
--And my mother went above and beyond, taking care of all the heavy lifting, making ice packs, changing bandages, heating up food, sleeping on a blow-up mattress in my bedroom, talking me through the awkward side effects, and being my watching partner for 12 episodes of Downton Abbey.
It's a beautiful thing to see the Body of Christ use their gifts to so selflessly serve someone in need. And yet, all too often, my pride makes me not want to be the one who is in need; I try to take over and not allow the Body to do what it was intended to do.
But today, I am so very grateful for the way that our Heavenly Father has gifted each person to serve and for the way that the Body of Christ has blessed me.
But after a difficult March, which found me awakening most nights struggling to breathe because my nasal passages had swollen shut, I made the decision to undergo septoplasty to correct my double-deviated septum. It wasn't easy to wave the white flag, knowing that I would be dependent on others for several days.
And yet, it was during this time of dependence that I was able to see even more clearly the Lord's provision. This time through the Body of Christ that He has surrounded me with:
--A sweet friend got up at dark-thirty and drove me and my mother to the hospital.
--Another sweet friend picked us up from the hospital and brought us dinner.
--Friends and family prayed me through.
--Friends and family texted and called to check on me.
--A cookie bouquet arrived from a friend.
--A friend loaned me Downton Abbey to occupy my mind and to help pass the time.
--Another friend brought dinner.
--Co-workers covered for me at work.
--And my mother went above and beyond, taking care of all the heavy lifting, making ice packs, changing bandages, heating up food, sleeping on a blow-up mattress in my bedroom, talking me through the awkward side effects, and being my watching partner for 12 episodes of Downton Abbey.
It's a beautiful thing to see the Body of Christ use their gifts to so selflessly serve someone in need. And yet, all too often, my pride makes me not want to be the one who is in need; I try to take over and not allow the Body to do what it was intended to do.
But today, I am so very grateful for the way that our Heavenly Father has gifted each person to serve and for the way that the Body of Christ has blessed me.
Sunday, March 31, 2013
His Extravagant Grace
Just a short post today. . .
As today is Easter, I'm taking some time to just soak up the unfathomable Truth of the Gospel--that Christ came to earth and lived without sin; that He took on my sin (past, present, and future) and died the death that I should have died; and that through His death on the cross, He became my sin substitute so that the curtain was torn, and I am no longer separated from God by my sin.
May this Truth, and the fact that I am daily in need of His extravagant grace, fall afresh on me each and every day, not just at Easter.
As today is Easter, I'm taking some time to just soak up the unfathomable Truth of the Gospel--that Christ came to earth and lived without sin; that He took on my sin (past, present, and future) and died the death that I should have died; and that through His death on the cross, He became my sin substitute so that the curtain was torn, and I am no longer separated from God by my sin.
May this Truth, and the fact that I am daily in need of His extravagant grace, fall afresh on me each and every day, not just at Easter.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
His Grace in Reminding Me Who I am
A few weeks ago, I engaged in pure vanity: I asked a friend to take a headshot of me for a professional directory because the picture taken by the professional organization did not meet my expectations. It didn't even fit all my hair in the frame. For a gal with big Texas hair, that's not acceptable.
As I posed for different shots, a process that makes me uneasy and feels completely unnatural and awkward, I realized that there was/is such a heart struggle in this process. The struggle in my heart is one of trying to believe what God's Word says--that He calls me His Beloved--versus the screams and shouts of today's culture that beauty is such a high and unachievable "standard" that I will never measure up to.
One of the speakers at a retreat that I attended this past weekend shared other good reminders about true beauty:
**We are God's masterpiece, created in His image.
**Our value in Him never changes.
**Refuse to define yourself by others' views.
**Refuse to believe personal labels you've attached to your soul, as well as any designer labels that you think will bring you value when you wear them.
**Lasso your rogue cravings. {The mental picture of this makes me smile.}
**Real beauty comes from understanding God's love.
**Humility is the beginning of beauty.
All of these thoughts stem from the Truth of His Word:
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." 1 Peter 3:3-4
"But the Lord said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.'" 1 Samuel 16:7
"Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out." Romans 12:2 (MSG)
"How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!" Psalm 139:17-18 (NLT)
I'm grateful that the Lord has provided a definition of "beauty" that is not centered on how much we can buy to make our outer selves prettier but on how He changes our heart the more and more we spend time with Him. The kind of beauty we are given by Him does not fade and cannot be taken away.
I pray that I would rest in that definition and reject anything contrary that the world imposes.
As I posed for different shots, a process that makes me uneasy and feels completely unnatural and awkward, I realized that there was/is such a heart struggle in this process. The struggle in my heart is one of trying to believe what God's Word says--that He calls me His Beloved--versus the screams and shouts of today's culture that beauty is such a high and unachievable "standard" that I will never measure up to.
One of the speakers at a retreat that I attended this past weekend shared other good reminders about true beauty:
**We are God's masterpiece, created in His image.
**Our value in Him never changes.
**Refuse to define yourself by others' views.
**Refuse to believe personal labels you've attached to your soul, as well as any designer labels that you think will bring you value when you wear them.
**Lasso your rogue cravings. {The mental picture of this makes me smile.}
**Real beauty comes from understanding God's love.
**Humility is the beginning of beauty.
All of these thoughts stem from the Truth of His Word:
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." 1 Peter 3:3-4
"But the Lord said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.'" 1 Samuel 16:7
"Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out." Romans 12:2 (MSG)
"How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!" Psalm 139:17-18 (NLT)
I'm grateful that the Lord has provided a definition of "beauty" that is not centered on how much we can buy to make our outer selves prettier but on how He changes our heart the more and more we spend time with Him. The kind of beauty we are given by Him does not fade and cannot be taken away.
I pray that I would rest in that definition and reject anything contrary that the world imposes.
Sunday, March 17, 2013
March Update
What I'm Pondering:
Jen Hatmaker's post on grace is a must-read here.
Amy's post on the Verge conference makes me want to "Just Go" next year.
And Ann Voskamp's most recent post on radical living tears me apart in a good way.
What I'm Listening To:
I just received the Passion 2013 CD, and it is sing-along, dance-along worthy. Excellent.
What I'm Reading:
I've continued "eating" books lately, including Sacred Search by Gary Thomas. It's just as good as his prior book Sacred Influence.
Today, I just finished reading a book on the benefits of apple cider vinegar. Sounds random, I know. But my mother recommended it, and I'm on board for trying a teaspoon in a cup of water a couple of times a day because I'm not the best when it comes to eating veggies.
I'm about two-thirds of the way through Brene Brown's latest book called Daring Greatly. The language isn't all clean, but the conclusions that she shares on her twelve-year study of shame and vulnerability is eye-opening. I'm still wrapping my mind around the first four chapters. Very interesting read. (Please excuse the coconut oil fingerprints all over the cover.)
What I'm Enjoying:
It's springtime, and although the pollen has wreaked havoc on my sinuses, I love seeing what God is up to in nature. Things that looked dead just a few weeks ago are now budding, reminding me that He is a Restorer and an amazing Artist and Creator.
What are you enjoying right now?
Jen Hatmaker's post on grace is a must-read here.
Amy's post on the Verge conference makes me want to "Just Go" next year.
And Ann Voskamp's most recent post on radical living tears me apart in a good way.
What I'm Listening To:
I just received the Passion 2013 CD, and it is sing-along, dance-along worthy. Excellent.
I've continued "eating" books lately, including Sacred Search by Gary Thomas. It's just as good as his prior book Sacred Influence.
Today, I just finished reading a book on the benefits of apple cider vinegar. Sounds random, I know. But my mother recommended it, and I'm on board for trying a teaspoon in a cup of water a couple of times a day because I'm not the best when it comes to eating veggies.
I'm about two-thirds of the way through Brene Brown's latest book called Daring Greatly. The language isn't all clean, but the conclusions that she shares on her twelve-year study of shame and vulnerability is eye-opening. I'm still wrapping my mind around the first four chapters. Very interesting read. (Please excuse the coconut oil fingerprints all over the cover.)
What I'm Enjoying:
It's springtime, and although the pollen has wreaked havoc on my sinuses, I love seeing what God is up to in nature. Things that looked dead just a few weeks ago are now budding, reminding me that He is a Restorer and an amazing Artist and Creator.
What are you enjoying right now?
Sunday, March 10, 2013
His Grace in Frustration
Confession: Lately, I have been a grumbler.
I have grumbled about my work, my allergies and the resulting headaches, my singleness, my finances, and so many other things that I am embarrassed of. I have grumbled for no other reasons except that I don't like God's plans and that I'd prefer stress-free, comfortable living--thank You very much.
Honestly, I just want God to put this seal on my life:
I want the frustrations removed. All of them. And the Lord knows that, but He also knows what I need in order to draw near to Him.
That difficult work scenario? It had me praying for good health, strength, energy, and wisdom to do my job more than I have ever prayed for those things before.
Those allergies and headaches? They enable me to sympathize with those who are struggling with their health and prompt me to pray for their healing along with my own.
Walking through life solo? That keeps me on my knees and in desperate dependence on Him as my Provider and Comforter.
When I come to Him in these situations, He's big enough to handle my harsh words and the fists that I shake at Him. Because He is holy, my outbursts and many requests do not drain Him of His power, His time, or His resources. And because He is omnipresent, the rest of you don't have to wait in line while He's busy listening to me and my laundry list of complaints. (And the people said, "AMEN!")
I'm not a burden on Him.
I often have to repeat that to myself: I'm not a burden on Christ.
He has already taken my sins--past, present, and future--and canceled them out on the cross, offering me a lifetime of grace. And instead of becoming tired of me, He offers me His presence at all times and the invitation to continually commune with Him. It's a gift that no other can offer.
So for any of you who, like me, missed out on the frustration-free packaging of life, voice your complaints to the One Who made you and Who can walk with you through them. His grace is sufficient, even (and especially) when your attitude is one of frustration.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you., for my power is made perfect in weakness."
2 Corinthians 12:9
I have grumbled about my work, my allergies and the resulting headaches, my singleness, my finances, and so many other things that I am embarrassed of. I have grumbled for no other reasons except that I don't like God's plans and that I'd prefer stress-free, comfortable living--thank You very much.
Honestly, I just want God to put this seal on my life:
I want the frustrations removed. All of them. And the Lord knows that, but He also knows what I need in order to draw near to Him.
That difficult work scenario? It had me praying for good health, strength, energy, and wisdom to do my job more than I have ever prayed for those things before.
Those allergies and headaches? They enable me to sympathize with those who are struggling with their health and prompt me to pray for their healing along with my own.
Walking through life solo? That keeps me on my knees and in desperate dependence on Him as my Provider and Comforter.
When I come to Him in these situations, He's big enough to handle my harsh words and the fists that I shake at Him. Because He is holy, my outbursts and many requests do not drain Him of His power, His time, or His resources. And because He is omnipresent, the rest of you don't have to wait in line while He's busy listening to me and my laundry list of complaints. (And the people said, "AMEN!")
I'm not a burden on Him.
I often have to repeat that to myself: I'm not a burden on Christ.
He has already taken my sins--past, present, and future--and canceled them out on the cross, offering me a lifetime of grace. And instead of becoming tired of me, He offers me His presence at all times and the invitation to continually commune with Him. It's a gift that no other can offer.
So for any of you who, like me, missed out on the frustration-free packaging of life, voice your complaints to the One Who made you and Who can walk with you through them. His grace is sufficient, even (and especially) when your attitude is one of frustration.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you., for my power is made perfect in weakness."
2 Corinthians 12:9
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