His Grace in Friendships

Because I've chosen "grace" as my one-word resolution or focus for this year, I thought it would be wise to chronicle what I'm learning on here so that I won't forget the nuances that He has been faithful to show me. 

Grace is so difficult to wrap my mind around, but at a most basic level, grace is something that I haven't worked for and can't earn.  My friend Krista often uses the term "grace gift," and that is what so many people are in my life.  The Lord has blessed me with friendships that I could have never dreamed of and has sustained friendships over the years and over the miles, even without a lot of effort or work on my part. 

On New Year's Eve in 1991, I went to babysit a little girl and a little boy, whom I had babysat before on several occasions.  But on that night in addition to those two children, I was also asked to babysit two other boys, one of whom was nine and a half and the other of whom was almost four years old.  It was a bit of a wild ride to try to keep them all entertained, but we survived the night without any major incidents.  Shortly thereafter, the mother of the two boys started having me babysit on a regular basis.  She lived in a gorgeous home, and it was fun to "play house" while I was there.  The boys were well-behaved for the mostpart, though they did throw me for a few loops, such as the Sunday when the younger boy did not want to wear underwear to church and the Sunday when the older boy did not want to go to church.  Thankfully, my persuasion skills must have been at an all-time high because I "won" on both accounts without bribery and only had to concede that the older boy could come to my Sunday school class with me in lieu of going to the one for his age group. 

Those boys ultimately moved to Austin, and I went off to college and didn't see them regularly.  But over the past several years, the Lord has allowed our paths to cross again as we share a love for the Longhorns. 

And by His grace, I was there last year shortly after the older boy's first child was born.

And I was there this year for her one-year birthday celebration.

But this is just one example of many.

I met Momma Bean (I think after Chapel one day) in college.  We were merely acquaintances on campus.  But the Lord orchestrated for us to become roommates my final year in college, for us to later become roommates in grad school, and for our paths to cross a third time as we lived in the same city for a while.  I hope the Lord allows our paths to cross many more times and puts our rooms next to each other in Heaven because we can pick up right where we last left off and chat forever.

I met my friend Becky during an internship while I was in grad school.  I later accepted a position at the place where I interned, and Becky and I were in a Bible study together.  That was over twelve years ago, and we still check in weekly with one another and lift one another up in prayer.

I met my friend Melissa on a prayer retreat.  We both arrived late and ended up getting a back room that had only three people in it (the two of us plus the gal I rode with).  The friendship we struck up there almost twelve years ago was fortified when we joined a small group together and has been sustained by the Lord's grace as Melissa is now married and has two children on top of being a professor.

I met my friend Susie in that same small group with Melissa.  We no longer attend the same church, but the Lord has kept our friendship going strong.

And then there's Krista, whom I met online through another friend's blog.  Chances are that I had met her before because she is my neighborhood pharmacist, but it was the blog connection that God used to start a friendship.

This list could go on and on, but these are just a few examples of the many creative ways that the Lord has used to plant God-fearing friends in my life.  He has given me immeasurably more than I could have asked for or imagined when it comes to the quantity and quality of friendships that I have; I could not have earned this favor or these friends.  The plain and simple truth is that they are all grace gifts from the Lord.

February Update

There are a few topics swirling around in this head of mine, but none have had time to gel.  So I thought I'd give a monthly update because it has already been almost a month since the last one.

What I'm Pondering: 
I'm reading through the Gospel of Luke right now, and I was struck by the transition in Chapter 4.  The chapter begins with Jesus being tempted in the desert. After the devil departs in verse 13, the heading before verse 14 says, "Jesus Begins His Ministry."  I think I've glossed over the fact that Jesus began His ministry after a time of testing and temptation.  It encourages me to take my struggles and find a way to minister to others so that my struggles can be used for His glory.

What I'm Listening To:
I'm still listening to Chris Tomlin's Burning Lights quite a bit, but I also downloaded All Sons & Daughters' new EP called The Longing.  I saw a recommendation for this album on Twitter, and I'm so glad that I checked them out.  The harmonies of this worship duo are absolutely beautiful.

I also downloaded the audio of Romans to help with memorizing Chapter 1.  I need all the help I can get as I'm struggling with this much more than I did when I memorized Psalm 91.

What I'm Reading:
I've been reading in every spare moment lately, and I've finished most of the books that I had started last year.  From those I've finished, I gleaned a lot about truth, love, and grace and the interplay between those concepts from Tim & Kathy Keller's The Real Meaning of Marriage; I learned more about being the hands and feet of Jesus from Brandon Hatmaker's book Barefoot Church; I whipped through the pages of Christine Caine's book Undaunted as she told of her upbringing and her heart's desire to rescue women from sex-trafficking; and I laughed uncontrollably through the bulk of Melanie Shankle's debut memoir Sparkly Green Earrings.

Currently, I'm slowly going through Because He Loves Me: How Christ Transforms Our Daily Life by Elyse Fitzpatrick.  It's quite possible that I've never underlined this much before in a book.  Fitzpatrick writes about the Gospel for Believers, and I'm trying to soak up every word.  Everything she writes keeps pointing me back to my one-word resolution of "grace."

I told my mother earlier today that I wish I could just eat books.  I'm such a slow reader and there are so many books that I want to read that I'd love to digest one each meal!  That's probably a weird visual, but it fits.

Recharging

After a crazy workload last month, even working on a holiday, I finally waved the white flag and decided to take some time off.  I used to be disciplined about taking a vacation day every so often as a mental health holiday.  But over the past year or so, I've gotten into the habit of taking time off only when I have something planned or will be out of town. 

That changed this past week.

I saw that I didn't have anything planned for this weekend and thought it would be a good time for a mental health vacation.  I left work at lunch on Thursday feeling a little bit like a truck had run over me, but it was just mountain cedar.  After a three-hour nap, I was as a good as new.  Make that Exhibit A of why I needed to take some time off.

I've enjoyed more than just that nap over the past three and a half days.  During that time, the Lord seemed to be writing a prescription for this introvert's heart and mind to rest while simultaneously being recharged and renewed.  Some of the highlights have included:

--the three-hour nap (worth mentioning again)
--no forced bedtimes
--no being awakened by an alarm clock
--leisurely lunch at The Kimbell
--a long hot bath
--a walk at TCU (would have taken a couple more, but oh the mountain cedar!)
--dinner with a friend at a new restaurant and crafts afterwards (making a t-shirt to match my pajama pants)

--finishing three of the four books I'd already started
--sipping Barney & Sons Pomegranate Oolong hot tea or Trader Joe's Organic Hot Chocolate almost every day

Ideally, I would have loved to have spent this time at a scenic cabin or a pretty lakehouse, but the fact that I was at my house meant no packing or travel, which also has its perks.  And, I was able to run some errands and get some chores done during brief spurts when I was able to pull myself away from reading.

But I admit that this wasn't a guilt-free time of relaxation.  There always seems to be this twinge of guilt over taking time off for myself rather than using my time off in a more sacrificial way. 

How do you balance the two?  I'd love some insight.  And I'd enjoy hearing what your perfect prescription for recharging is.

Grasping and Giving Grace

It's already February, but I'm just now getting around to posting my one-word resolution for 2013.  The word I've chosen this year is "grace."  And, I must say that it is stretching me.

As a first-born, Type A, rule-follower, I naturally tend toward a Pharisee-type approach to life, that is everyone should follow the rules, just like I do.  It wasn't a stretch when I chose a career that puts a premium on obeying the law and has very little, if any, provision for grace. 

It's just been during the past few years that I've realized how little I've understood about grace.  And this realization came despite having accepted Christ almost twenty-five years ago.

So as I pondered what word might capture the theme for this year, "grace" kept coming to mind.  I want to grasp it, not tangibly in my hands, but to gain a deeper understanding.  And then to give it to others as freely as God gives it to me.

But looking at my actions in January through the lens of grace, I failed.  Not just a little.  A lot.  I want justice at every turn.  That's my first reaction.  So it's obvious that it is going to take every bit of the remaining days in 2013 to reprogram my heart and mind, with the Lord's help, to react with grace first.  And to rest in that, knowing that God can hand out any justice that needs to be doled out.

Thankfully, I'm not on my own in trying to make these crucial changes.  I'm grateful that His Word says, "The LORD your God will circumcise your hearts and the hearts of your descendants, so that you may love Him with all your heart and with all your soul, and live."  Deuteronomy 30:6

How are you doing with your resolutions?

Storing the Word

A friend of mine says that when things are getting a bit off in her world, she asks herself whether she's been taking her vitamins and memorizing God's Word.  Those two things inevitably make the biggest difference in her overall health.

For so many years, I considered memorizing Scripture as "optional"--something I would do when things settled down in my life .  And interestingly, the fruit I was producing matched the amount of Scripture I had committed to memory:  none.

Then, my church set out to memorize Galatians.  Not just one or two verses.  Not even just a chapter.  THE WHOLE BOOK.  And because my small group was "all in," I, as the leader, decided to be "all in."  The accountability in Scripture memory paid off, just as it does when it's set up in other areas of life.  I can't say that all six chapters were committed to memory, but a lot more were committed to memory than if I hadn't tried at all. 

Two years ago, my family and I decided to memorize Psalm 91.  The benefits of that have been innumerable.  That one psalm has come to mind hundreds of times since committing it to memory, and I've been able to share portions of it with friends during times when they needed protection.  Having that psalm in my memory bank to draw on when I am fearful has been so powerful.

Yet, despite how powerful that Scripture memory was, during 2012, I didn't set out to memorize any new Scripture verses.  Unfortunately, the failure to set a goal meant that I settled back into status quo.

I resolved to change that this year.  I set out to memorize Psalm 34, and I'm already three verses in.  But I'm changing course.  Ann Voskamp has challenged her readers to memorize several chapters from Romans.  Initially, I thought, "That's not something I want to do; I've already chosen my single psalm to memorize, and that's what I want to do."  How very mature of me.  The real obstacle was that it sounded like a big chore, and I was playing the "lazy" card.

But now that a friend has jumped on board, I'm feeling peer pressure in the most positive way and have the accountability that I need.  Despite the fact that I'm almost four weeks behind, I'm going to try to play catch-up and tackle this big goal.  And much like the large project that I just finished up at work by doing a little every day, I need to focus on little chunks at a time and not on the fact that there are THREE CHAPTERS. 

So we'll see how the next forty-eight weeks go.  At the end of that time, I hope to say that I have stored more of God's Word in my heart.

The Past & The Present

2012 came and went without a single blogpost, other than the Christmas letter that I just cut and pasted on here to make sure I remember some of the key highlights.  If you were kind enough to drop in during my blog sabbatical, thank you for your loyalty and patience.

My co-worker had a baby last year, so that meant lots of writing at work and resulted in no motivation to write after hours.  Most nights I didn't even turn on my computer.  Some of that "offline time" was filled with studying.  I enjoyed completing Beth Moore's study on James and her study on David - Seeking A Heart Like His, as well as Randy Alcorn's study on Heaven.  But I wish I had made myself capture some of the "dailies" here.  I will try to be better about that this year, but I can't make any promises because some new deadlines at work have already cut into my attempts to get on here earlier this year.  So, I may resort to trying to capture a month at a time. 

What I'm Pondering This Month:
I listened to Francis Chan's talk at Passion 2013 and was struck by what his church looks like now:  5 to 10 minutes of worship; 5 to 10 minutes of prayer; 2 hours of door-to-door ministering to those in poor neighborhoods, asking what they need and praying with them; and gathering back together to tell stories from the day.  The focus is on making disciples.  It has me wondering if the American idea of "church" has become a little too consumer-ish. 

What I'm Listening To This Month:

 

A friend treated me to Chris Tomlin's new cd, and it's been on repeat in my car for a while now.  Every track is exceptional, but "Lay Me Down" and "Sovereign" are two songs that I keep going back to, along with "God's Great Dance Floor."

 

I've also found a new radio station called 88.3 The Journey, which seems to be a mix of KLTY and KCBI, two Christian radio stations in the Metroplex.  The Journey is based in Keene, so it's coverage isn't the best as you head north or west of the Metroplex.  But it has virtually no commercials and lots of good music, along with snipits of sermons.

 

What I'm Reading This Month:

I have four books started right now, which is very unlike me; I'm normally a one-book-at-a-time kind of gal.  Before the college football season kicked off, I started two books--The Meaning of Marriage and How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and How to Listen So Kids Will Talk (which received high praise for working on adults, just as well as kids).  And then I got a great deal on Barefoot Church by Jen Hatmaker's husband and started it, along with Undaunted by Christine Caine.  I'm hoping to get some good reading time in over the next few weekends if work eases up.

 

So, that's a short update to kick off my return to the blog.  I'm not going to presume that anyone is still checking this, but if you are, what are you pondering, listening to, and reading these days?  I'd love to hear.

Christmas Letter 2012

Christmas greetings!

            As I sat down to write this letter, unsure of how to start, a glimpse of the spiral next to my computer with my “gift list” caught my eye.  I started my “gift list” around this time two years ago after reading Ann Voskamp’s book One Thousand Gifts — A Dare To Live Fully Right Where You Are.  Since then, I’ve listed not just 1,000 but almost 3,000 gifts that the Lord has blessed me with.  And through this process, I’ve learned to notice the little things in each day that I know He intended just for me because they speak to my heart.  Some of the highlights from this past year include:

·         Finding just the right person to give my Christmas Jar to last year.

·         New friends the Lord has placed in my path, many of whom are much younger than me (it’s such grace that they even think I’m relevant or interesting!).

·         Getting the opportunity to host family and friends several times over the summer because I’m still in my house.

·         Financial provision when, in a three-week span, the air conditioner in my house was struck by lightning (which was not covered by the warranty) and my more-than-twelve-year-old car retired.

·         Being able to attend three Longhorn football games.

·         My mother’s retirement after 43.5 years at Warm Springs Rehabilitation Hospital.

·         Continuing to find treasures in His Word that encourage my heart, like this from Habakkuk 2:3:

“For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end – it will not lie.  If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay.”

·         Having Erin home for Thanksgiving for the first time in five years.

·         Anticipating giving my Christmas Jar to someone in need this Christmas.

Ann Voskamp writes, “All’s grace,” and encourages readers to give thanks in all circumstances.  So I’m slowly learning to identify and be thankful for those things that are hard to be thankful for, like when the Lord uses something to humble me or gives me circumstances that I wouldn’t have chosen. 

I hope that you and your family have experienced abundant blessings from the Lord throughout 2012 and that you take time during the seasons of Advent and Christmas to thank Him for all of the little ways that He has blessed you as you celebrate the ultimate Gift, the birth of Jesus. 

                                                                                                Merry Christmas!

                                                                                                Alyssa