Birthday Blog Tour

"How can you creatively celebrate the birthday of someone whose love languages are gifts and words of encouragement?" This is the question I started pondering in late October, and immediately, the idea of a blog tour came to mind. I thought it would be fun to have several friends post something special on their blogs to celebrate this sweet Friend's birthday. And thankfully, I found volunteers who were willing to participate, despite how crazy-sounding my idea was. So without further ado, here's the first stop on the birthday blog tour celebrating my friend TJ's birthday, which is on December 3.

TJ,

Who agrees to give a ride to and stay overnight in a hotel with a gal she barely knows? That would be you back in September 2007. You graciously agreed to let me go with you to the North Texas Christian Writers' Conference, and I not only gained a writing mentor but also a friend. You gave me pointers before the conference (i.e., that I might want to take notecards to write thank-you notes to speakers while there and hand deliver them), guided me through the conference, and helped me process what I had learned as we made the trip back. When life resumed on the Monday after the conference, I realized how lucky I was to have had one-on-one time to pick your brain on writing, being a wife and mother, and doing daily life.

I came away amazed by how wonderfully you balance being a wife to Corbin and a mother to Branson, Hudson, Basden, and Esther. I love how you are intentional about taking time for you and Corbin to get away and how the two of you, as a couple, are intentional about making your kids feel special by spending time with them individually.

But most of all, these past two years as we've been in a writers' group together, I have been inspired by your obedience, both in using your writing talent and in raising your kids. I know that the urge to write must overwhelm you at times. But you have strived to make your family a priority and sought God's will on how and when you could utilize your writing talent without neglecting your family. Similarly, it has been a joy to watch as you have been open to God's leading on how best to educate your children. You have been willing to reevaluate each year and to try new alternatives when the status quo was no longer working as well as you wanted.

As I watch you live out your faith, your obedience to Christ blesses and encourages me. I am grateful God has given me the opportunity to be mentored and befriended by you, and I look forward to seeing what He does through you in the years to come.

Happy early birthday, Friend, and look for the Birthday Blog Tour to continue tomorrow on Nikki's blog!

TJ in pink at the 2008 North Texas Christian Writers' Conference

Stumbling Block Not Writer's Block

This is the post that's been rumbling around in my head and my heart for the past couple of weeks. It's the one that I wrote and then was tempted not to post. I kept trying to tell myself that it's not a big deal; it's not worth posting. But really, it is a big deal to me, whether I like it or not. So from that standpoint, I've persuaded myself to go ahead and post what I wrote during my birthday week.

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I've been dreading this week for a while. For some reason, turning thirty-five has a powerful hold on me. But it's not the number. It's the number combined with life circumstances. And I wish there was some way to convey that without sounding like poor pitiful me because I know that I am very blessed. I put forth the following because to type anything less would be to dishonor the feelings in my heart and because I hope that this will provide insight on how not to respond to others in similar circumstances.

My birthday has come up in several conversations lately with people I don't really know, and the conversations generally went something like this:

Lady in passing: Did you say that your birthday is this week?

Me: Yes. It's the first one that I've actually dreaded.

Lady in passing: Really? Which one is it?

Me: 35.

Lady in passing: Oh, well I turned [insert age higher than 35] recently. Thirty-five is nothing.

Me: (Trying to smile outwardly and grimacing inwardly because Lady is married and has children. She has no idea what it is like to come home on her birthday to no one, except a Golden Retriever. Yet, there's no way to explain all that is going on in my heart in a passing conversation with someone I don't really know.)

It's not that I never thought I'd turn thirty-five; it's that I never dreamed I'd turn thirty-five and not have a husband and family to share that day with.

Two years ago, I told my friends that if I was still single at thirty-five, I was going to plan a big party for my thirty-fifth birthday because I wanted the benefit of having everyone together like when family and friends gather for a wedding and wedding reception. But in order to plan that big get-together, I had to commit to the fact that I would be single. And I just couldn't bring myself to admit that. Needless to say, the big party never occurred.

But my sweet friends--both married and single--helped me celebrate my birthday and got me through it. It's been their (your) encouragement that has carried me through some lonely nights. So thanks for understanding and for loving me well.

Happy Birthday to . . .

My mother!

Although we celebrated my mother’s birthday back in June so that her sisters and other relatives could come surprise her, today is her actual birthday. I’ve been thinking about how I could honor her on her special day and thought I’d share a portion of the wonderful legacy that she has bestowed upon my sister and me.

One thing that I love about my mother is that she leads by example and does so in so many areas of her life. For one, she is a woman of strong convictions, but she does not force them upon others. (Although my sister says there is some sort of eyebrow raising that occurs to indicate Mother’s displeasure; however, I am not familiar with it.)

At her job, she exemplifies what it means to be loyal and what it means to serve. She has worked at the same job for almost forty years, helping others learn to use their arms again after a stroke or an accident. She cares deeply about her patients, and it is evident in her work ethic.

With what God has blessed her with, she has demonstrated what it means to be a good steward. She takes good care of herself and manages money incredibly well. Raising two daughters and sending them to college on a single income without taking on debt is nothing short of miraculous, and she’d be the first to give the praise and glory to God for His financial provision as well as for healing her from cancer four years ago.

In her free time, she somehow manages to bless others with her hobbies--whether it be baking a treat for someone‘s special day, writing in calligraphy on a card, doing counted crossstitch to give as a gift, or loaning out a great book that she’s read and recommends.

And all of her leading by example is covered by prayer as she is a devout prayer warrior, whom I am grateful to have praying for me!

So on this her special day, we honor her and thank her for her amazing legacy, for knowing our hearts, and for loving us well!!!

With much love,
BITS (Bluebonnet In The Snow) and BITS-E

Childlike Anticipation

It doesn’t take Christmas for me to be filled with childlike anticipation. Though that feeling is usually centered around times with gifts. And gift giving to be more specific.

I have this trait/disorder of not being able to wait to give a gift. As soon as I buy a gift, I want to give it. But having family and friends who live more than a few hours’ drive away, it just isn’t feasible for me to be able to give them their gifts immediately. And the postal service can only go so far in one day unless you shell out the big bucks for the overnite ponies.

So I’ve come up with a new little habit. After I ship the package, I wait a few minutes, and then I get the urge to call to see if the package has made it. You’d think I’d be able to resist the urge. Surely as much as I’ve waited for other things in my life I could wait to hear from the recipient. But, I don’t.

Case in point: My sister’s birthday is tomorrow. I shipped her gift via Priority Mail on Friday morning. I knew her gift would arrive yesterday barring any mishandling or (gasp) loss of the package. And so I called. Not once, but twice yesterday to see if she’d gotten it. She hadn’t even made it home, and so I spoiled the surprise (not that she was getting a birthday present but that it was arriving that day). Spoiling the surprise doesn’t dissuade me from making the calls. I just need to know that the gift has arrived.

I’m sure that there are probably support groups out there for this little disorder that I suffer from. But, I don’t want to be cured. Instead, I’d rather have this childlike anticipation transfer over into other areas of my life. Like my spiritual walk.

What would it be like to apply that childlike anticipation to waiting for Jesus’s triumphant return? Or looking forward to Heaven? Or even just looking forward each day to what God might do in, around, and through me?

I don’t know, so I guess I’ll just have to try it.

In the meantime, happy birthday to my awesome sister!